((This story I have written together with Vernant Globewalker, so the credits go to him too; Vernant has written the white parts, I the orange))

***15 March 2005 – Before this all…

 

When one of the doctors enters Aaricia stares at him with big sad eyes, but also a glance of hope is visible in them.
“I never thought I would ever see you again..” She shows him a weak smile.
Then she whispers: “I hope you are going to get me out of here.. you will won’t you? You will save me from the brainwash.. you will give me placebo.. won’t you?”

"Aaricia, I did this for your future, so you can live and see peace some day. I couldn’t just let you die out there, I couldn't let them beat you up, cut your body apart or abuse you.", Vernant Globewalker answers quiet and calm.

Aaricia stares at him for a minute.
“Are you really going to-- please no.. please don’t change my memories, don’t change my mind please don’t..”, she looks very sad, tears form in her eyes.

He then offers her some cake Olis, his wife, baked earlier.
"Here, eat this. You deserve better then the rations they left for you.", he says nicely.
The tall, blonde man dressed in a long white lab coat loosens the straps, untying her arms, helping her sit up to eat.
"Take it calm and easy now, you didn't eat for some days.", he says worried.

Aaricia eats the cake slowly, it is visible that the cake tastes very good for her. She also cries softly while eating.

Vernant then lies her down again and patches her wrists, using bacta patches and laser to remove any scars. He leaves the arm straps off, but leaves her out of range of any objects, or the other straps.

Aaricia sighs, she is obviously very exhausted.

"The Imperials want me to turn you into a brainwashed Imperial zombie. Not that I will do so. You will stay to be you, except with no more Rebel convictions, so that you act as a citizen, not fighting the law, but not worshipping Imperials either. You fought your war, now let others fight it.", he says quietly.
He frowns, feeling guilty.

“You mean this serious don’t you? You really want to help me, I can see it in your eyes.”, Aaricia gasps and stares in his eyes, “You really want to save my life and give me the best that you can offer..”
She sighs and for a minute there is silence; they both don’t say any word.
“My convictions.. they are part of me.. if they are gone then I’m not Aaricia anymore.”, she continues after this moment with a soft sad voice, “I will become a different person. That is the same for me as dying. I will die Vernant, I will die if you remove them..”

"Aaricia, when you are out of here, I will get you a house, a new identity to start a whole new life, a car, a pet if you like and a good job with lots of prestige. I will give you the life few can have, and will always be at your disposal, if you need anything. I will arrange that you can clean up every day, eat a normal meal and that they won't medicate you so far you turn sick or stoned during this 2 weeks treatment.", Vernant says guilty.

She shrugs, looking depressed but after another painful moment of silence she suddenly stares into his sincere eyes, new tears come out of her eyes and crawl over her cheeks.
“I feel so lonely.. I miss my friends.. I miss them so much.. now I will never see them again I wont recognize them anymore..”, she sobs looking terrified, “I.. I guess this is the best thing that can happen to me in this situation.. but still I will die, Vernant I will die..”
She closes her eyes and looks to the opposite direction, lying back on the bed.

He leaves a radio on with some calming music to make the silence less noticeable. He also offers to stay the night in the lab if Aaricia is afraid to be alone.

“Maybe you better don’t do that.. they could get suspicious. I.. I will manage.. I have been alone and beaten up for more than two weeks. It is ok to be alone another night without being beaten up and the radio on.”, Aaricia says.
For a very short time it looks like she shows a faint smile, then she looks sad again.
“This is the last night before I will be changed.. my, Aaricia’s, last night..”
She sighs.
“I’m not afraid to be alone, I’m terrified to not be myself anymore.”

After another moment of silence the man hands her a datapad.
"Write down a message to yourself, about proud, to a girl who will face a life with no worries. Tell her your message, your words, but let it not mention any rebel information or info against the Empire.", he says softly.
He sits down next to her.
"Aaricia, you will keep all good memories of life. You still have some friends left. Lyzzie, Olis, Iara, Lalamalani, Ravion, Remair, and I hope also me.", he says to her reassuring.

“I guess you only have to program it into my brain and you will be my friend too..”, Aaricia sighs.

Vernant leaves, turning the light into a soft shading.
"Work with me here Aaricia, so that today is the last day they have hurt you. A whole new life will start for you, where I will always look over you and make sure no more harm will come to you. Sleep now, tomorrow will be a long, but painless day. I hope you decide to cooperate with us.", he mumbles quietly to himself.

Aaricia sighs, sobbing she closes her eyes.

Next day Vernant finds the datapad next to a sleeping Aaricia.
On the datapad the following is typed:

To the person to which I directed this message,

for a long time I have been a very good friend of you, although I don’t think you know me, and that’s ok. I’m going to die soon, if you are reading this message I have already died. You can’t imagine how hard it is for me to leave you forever, but I will always be there in your mind, I will never ever let you down!
Never give up fighting for your future. You will be happy.

Before this all I was like you.
A very good friend.